Thursday, January 15, 2009

Gasp!

There has been a lot of gasping going on around here lately. Mainly, the sharp intake of breath is due to the HORRENDOUSLY cold temps, which reached a high today of 4. That's four degrees Fahrenheit - not that balmy four degrees Celsius!

The other gasp was uttered by myself when I was given permission (by me) to drop a class. Yes, drop a class. This is something I do not do. I have always been one to plan, execute, achieve, celebrate (for a second) and jump back to plan, etc, etc, etc...

As I sat through this particular class on Tuesday afternoon (from 4-6 p.m. - aka: Kate's sleepy-and-need-caffeine time) I felt myself getting lower, and lower, and lower. And not just my mood - my chair was broken and sinking slowly.

"Why am I doing this?" I kept asking myself. The details of the class made me slightly queasy and exhausted. All I did was listen for two hours!

As I sat, I began to think about how to get out of this commitment. Besides moving to India or faking my own death, the logical explanation seemed to be to drop the class. I can hear you out there! You're saying, BIG DEAL! Everyone drops classes all the time - what's the dilemma?

I don't drop classes. I start something, I strive for excellence, and I finish something.

I achieve. It's what I do.

But, this week, I gave myself the chance to quit. Not fail, but quit.

I quit something that would have consumed my life.
I quit something that would have stolen my free time.
I quit something that would have given me the experience of doing exactly what I have been doing for the past 5 years.

And I am happy. And content.

I can quit. It doesn't kill me. And that could be the best lesson of all!

3 comments:

pat ve said...

I applaud your decision. I was never quite as driven nor could I excel like you, but I quit a course in grad. school just because I had nothing upon which to hand the concepts. It was physics.

Anonymous said...

What some people call quit, others call "choose". This no more makes you a quiter than if you started to walk across a busy intersection, saw a semi screaming your way and decided to "quit" walking and go back. It doesn't mean you are a quiter, it means you are capable of making decisions in your best interest. (Just wanted to make up for the previous "and not so positive" comment).
The word of the day is "cought"

Dennis and Valerie said...

I happily remember the day I dropped out of chemistry in college. Turns out, never needed it anyway! Whooo hooo for having that freedom. Good job, KT. :)